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What do you say when well-laid plans go awry, finances dip below your confidence level, a family member passes away, car repairs are not finished or medical needs such as a surgery date moved several times? Choose your favorite: ‘The bottom dropped out’, ‘I fell through the cracks’, ‘a fly in the ointment’, or taking the bull by the horns’?
Research: The idiom "the bottom fell out" is an idiom that means something has suddenly failed or is no longer able to function normally and effectively. For example, you might say "the bottom fell out of their hopes to make the playoffs" after a team loses a game. You could also say "the bottom fell out of the steel market" to describe a collapse.
"Fall through the cracks" is an idiom that means to be overlooked, neglected, or not noticed by a system or others. For example, "Little details often fall through the cracks". It can also mean to not be included or assisted with others. For example, "Please make sure that either our department or yours deals with this account, lest it fall between the cracks". Some say slipped through the cracks.
Fly in the ointment: Difficult situations and unpleasant experiences; an unpleasant or painful situation or person that you have to accept and deal with although you find it very difficult. Difficult things and people: hassle, hindrance, snag.
Take the bull by the Horns: It's usually hard to take the bull by the horns, since it means facing a fear or embarking on something difficult or complicated. Most people feel great, though, once they take the bull by the horns. Experts disagree about the exact origins of the phrase, though it was first recorded in the early 1700's. One guess involves the — somewhat terrifying — practice by bullfighters and some ranchers of forcing a bull's head down by grasping his horns and pushing.
In my informal poll Taking the bull by the horns and The Bottom fell out tied. No one chose Fly in the Ointment. I remember hearing Mom and her sisters use the expression. I use it occasionally
My prayer request during all the delays has been: Help me, Lord, to have a kind and positive attitude and to be aware of benefits from adjusting to routine upsets.
After delayed surgery because insurance company insisted on six weeks of PT; then after that, delayed because another question from the insurance company went unanswered. Dealing with an insurance company, in many instances, requires patience and as I have learned recently, phone calls from the patient. For this piece, I’ve chosen Take the bull by the horns, because that’s exactly what I did after surgery was delayed a third time because the doctor hadn’t received approval from the insurance. “Would it help if I called the Insurance”, I asked the nurse who was the bearer of delayed again status to which she said “Sometimes it does help.”
So, with fervent resolve I dialed the Insurance number. I’ll not go into detail about the hour and half phone call with Rosemary, a rep who said “Stay on the line while I chase down the problem; give me a few seconds; don’t hang up; I’ll be back”. And finally-- I’ll never forget her words--“I’ve found the problem—a paper glitch”. What a relief!
When I relay my account to friends about the delays, I usually hear a worse story than mine.
The problem was solved and August 6 is a new date. What benefits have I realized?
When my son David arrived as planned a day before for the third surgery date and I was told that my surgery has been postponed, we considered the week vacation time for both of us. What fun we had running around; extended family time was a treat. He said he had a blast.
I had time to finish some gardening that after the surgery, I would be restricted for six weeks. He made repairs on the house. We watched TV together, something we didn’t get to do very often. Plenty of visiting time satisfied both of us since we’re extroverted. And I was free to teach Adult Vacation Bible School class.
I gained confidence knowing that the many phone calls I had to make relating to the situation were well done in a timely manner. I didn’t know I needed to gain self-confidence, but I have—at 90 no less!
Eileen urged me to take the bull by the horns and stand up for myself and do what had to be done. She is a perfect example experiencing in the prime of her life in less than a week the total loss of sight due to her optic nerve dying, reversing being a very independent, popular and involved person to becoming totally dependent. She maintains a positive attitude wanting most of all to help someone by how she manages, with God’s help, all the changes ensued, blaming no one for her dilemma. “It is what it is”, she says.
Everyone faces disruptions, irritating delays and difficult people and needs to be championed by others to forge ahead through difficulties, disappointments and radical changes.
Consider your present difficulties. Think about the unrealized benefits that await you as you do the best you can, allowing the revelation of your strengths and/or weaknesses to make you a better person and a good example to your children, if you have any.
We acknowledge that problems and struggles reveal character, and that others observe how we accept and deal with setbacks, often involving unfairness, problems, losses, sadness of all kinds. People watch how we negotiate positively and pleasantly, maintaining good examples in speech and actions.
My sibs often discuss how our mother dealt with the bottom falling out when dad deserted her with six children, no money, no car and renting. She was calm, kind, uncritical, didn’t complain nor apologize for what she couldn’t help, doing what had to be done without much fanfare. Her goal was to keep us kids together. She sacrificed for us. We followed suit and all agree that because of her quiet, yet firm decision making has been the most significant key to the bond we sibs have and her example of going from nothing to survival has taught us to relax with problems, take small steps, trusting the Lord in everything.
She taught us by her example to get the most benefit from disappointment and hardship, that they make us strong. We also learned that church was her top priority. We moved into the three-room shack on a Saturday afternoon, and were driven to Tyler EUB (now UM) Sunday School and church by her sister and her husband the next day—the church that embraced and welcomed us, making us feel so special. That’s where John, Mac, David (retired Methodist ministers today) and I (a retired minister’s wife) found the Lord and grew in our faith. We learned to serve. Our two older sisters lived and worked in Columbus. We all have salvaged all the good that we could from a seemingly desperate situation. God is Good.
The Apostle Paul wrote: There has no temptation (problem) taken you but such as is common to man. But God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted (problemed) beyond that you are able; but will with the temptation (problem) also make a way to escape, that you may be able to bear it. I Cor. 10:13. KJV.
Then, in II Corinthians, Paul wrote that three times he had asked God to remove a bothersome malady—some scholars think perhaps headaches or eye problems that hindered his ministry. God answered Paul’s request personally: “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness”. One scholar explains: God did not take the thorn away but He gave Paul strength to bear it. God does not spare us things. He makes us able to conquer them and come through them. II Cor.12:8-9. NIV.